DATE: Thursday, April 10, 1997              TAG: 9704080169

SECTION: NORFOLK COMPASS         PAGE: 08   EDITION: FINAL 

SOURCE: By KENNAN NEWBOLD, STAFF WRITER 

                                            LENGTH:  100 lines

AT THE ALTAR: THIS TIME CLERGY TAKE VOWS

THE REV. ROBERT COOPER and the Rev. Frances Moody finally know what it's like to be on the other side of the altar.

On Saturday, they reversed their usual roles.

Instead of giving vows, they took them; and instead of standing alone in the front of the church to marry another couple, they stood together and got married.

Then, they began their life as a clergy couple in the Methodist church, and they owe it all to their shared faith.

``We just kind of came upon each other,'' said Moody.

Cooper and Moody met in 1995. Both were spiritual directors on a weekend retreat on the Eastern Shore.

``She was my boss,'' said Cooper. ``I was one of only two men on the retreat.''

The two had never been officially introduced, but they shared friends, and they both knew Virginia Savage.

``She said to me, `He's very charming. You'll just love him,' '' Moody recalled, smiling at her fiance.

Savage had told Cooper about Moody as well.

``I expected a much older person,'' said Cooper, 27. ``But then she walked in, and I realized I was mistaken.''

When the weekend was over, they went their separate ways - Moody returned to Norfolk and Cooper stayed on the Eastern Shore with plans to call his new friend later that week.

But Moody beat him to it and called the night she got home.

``I thought we both needed a good friend,'' said Moody, 34. ``After that, we started giving AT&T a lot of money.''

It's a two-hour trip from Cooper's former home in Sanford to Norfolk, so at first, they only met each other once a week, as friends. Gradually their friendship took on a different direction - a love for one another they say is based on mutual respect and understanding rooted in the church.

And then Cooper proposed.

``She wasn't feeling well that night, but I'd already bought the ring and had it in hand,'' said Cooper. ``And I remember thinking, `She's gonna get this ring today no matter what.' ''

On Dec. 6, 1996, he took her to Little Italy, a restaurant on the Eastern Shore. He gave a waitresses the ring with instructions to deliver it with dessert. It arrived atop the tiramisu.

With all the waitresses and restaurant staff watching, he got on his knees and asked Moody to make him the happiest man in the world.

``None of the customers even saw it,'' said Cooper. ``I was on my knees and everyone was still eating their spaghetti.''

Cooper and Moody wanted a small, informal wedding, but that's not what they got. The week before the ceremony, they were expecting 362 guests - friends, family, members of their churches, and, of course, those who were with them on the retreat.

``Everyone is taking credit for this marriage,'' said Moody.

Moody's church, Christ United Methodist, hosted the wedding reception Saturday and was so involved in the preparations that they dubbed it ``their wedding.''

One church member offered her horses for a horse and carriage ride around Bayview after the ceremony. Because they are both hopeless romantics, they took her up on the offer. Moody even rented ``Sense and Sensibility'' to see how to get into the carriage properly.

They're spending their honeymoon in England.

Both Moody and Cooper say clergy couples aren't that rare a breed.

``I think it's starting to happen more and more now,'' said Moody.

``Because it's nice to have your spouse in the same calling,'' added Cooper. ``It's easier to relate to one another.''

Because they are both pastors in the Methodist Church, they are sympathetic to the thought of being transferred, though neither is worried about being separated.

``When the church says, `Move,' you move,'' said Moody. ``But they are very sensitive to clergy couples.''

Moody, who grew up in Norfolk, has been a minister at Christ United Methodist Church for three years. Cooper, originally from the Eastern Shore, just recently moved to Cape Charles to be minister of Trinity United Methodist Church and Capeville United Methodist Church.

When they return from their honeymoon in England, they plan to share the two parsonages provided by their churches - one in Cape Charles near Cooper's church and the other in Norfolk near Moody's church.

``We'll have a city home and a farm house,'' said Moody.

When they're not at home, the couple likes to travel, walk on the beach, watch ``Star Trek: The Next Generation'' and go to the movies.

``What we really enjoy is the talk after the movie,'' said Moody.

Both agree that being together is what's important. Their companionship is what they value.

``It's a very lonely profession,'' said Moody. ``You're everyone's confidante and your life is so public that it's hard to find a private place.

``But we found in each other a priest - someone to hold our treasures, our confidences.''

``We're looking forward to being a family,'' said Cooper. ILLUSTRATION: Staff photos by VICKI CRONIS

The Revs. Frances and Robert Cooper leave the church in a

horse-drawn surrey for a ride around Bayview.

Well-wishers shower the newlywed ministers with bubbles after the

rites Saturday at Christ United Methodist Church.

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