DATE: Wednesday, June 11, 1997              TAG: 9706100057

SECTION: DAILY BREAK             PAGE: E1   EDITION: FINAL 

TYPE: Column 

SOURCE: Larry Bonko 

                                            LENGTH:  150 lines

WITLESS "ORIGINAL" PROGRAMMING IS ENOUGH TO DULL THE SENSES

WHAT COULD BE worse than a long, hot summer of reruns? A long, hot summer of witless original programming such as ``Oddville, MTV,'' which premieres Monday at 11 p.m.

How bad is ``Oddville, MTV''? The highlight of the premiere is a man stuffing 21 marshmallows in his mouth. That bad.

With the exception of Fox, and a few cable channels, programmers have decided that this will be the Lost Summer of 1997 with little new programming in the works.

Summer of late has been the time of the incredible shrinking TV audience. The networks' share of viewers falls to below 50 percent in hot weather. I guess it's hard to get a clear picture in a Winnebago tooling down the interstate at 70 mph.

Fewer eyeballs, less new programming. That's the networks' mantra everywhere but at Fox.

Fox said it will not abandon the summertime viewer, offering up two new series (``The Ruby Wax Show'' and ``Roar'') plus the return of ``Pacific Palisades'' tonight at 9.

ABC launched a new daytime soap opera - ``Port Charles,'' which airs at 12:30 p.m. - and come mid-August, Barbara Walters will be hosting ``The View,'' a daytime talk show twice a week.

CBS takes a family sitcom, ``Life. . . and Stuff,'' off the shelf to fill the 8:30 Friday night timeslot, and at 8:30 p.m. Tuesday, ABC plays the last episodes of the ``Life's Work'' comedy.

NBC on June 18 tosses in some original episodes for a limited run of ``Chicago Sons'' at 9:30. Warner Brothers tries out a new game show (``In the Dark'') starting June 22 at 9:30.

Beyond that, if it's new programs you want from now until September, call your cable provider. Or consider direct-broadcast satellite.

Comedy Central has four new series in the works for the summer, Home Box Office has three, MTV ordered four. Showtime also will do four. Cable in the next three months brings about 30 big-screen films to TV including ``The Birdcage'' and ``The Nutty Professor,'' while cutting loose with more than 20 features that were made for TV.

The Sci-Fi Channel on July 21 at 7:30 p.m. brings on a new series set in the year 2695. In ``Mission Genesis,'' six young, attractive space travelers awaken from a 498-year sleep on the way to re-populating Earth. Think of it as ``Aliens'' meets ``Beverly Hills 90210.''

Both broadcast TV and cable will be tossing in a few new specials as the summer marches on.

MTV plans a Fleetwood Mac reunion in August, PBS observes ``A Capitol Fourth'' on Independence Day, and on June 19, Geena Davis hosts a report on Lifetime about Title IX legislation that opened the way for women's athletics in college - ``Breaking Through: Our Turn to Play.''

Summer TV won't be a total wasteland but you won't miss much if you spend between now and Labor Day cruising the Internet, tending to your tomatoes, arranging your CDs in alphabetical order or making a list of videos to rent. ``There's more to summer television than re-runs,'' say the editors of TV Guide.

But not much more.

Tonight at 9, Fox brings back ``Pacific Palisades'' with Joan Collins returning as Her Bitchiness, a role she can play in her sleep. She's the scheming mother of a scheming daughter, both of whom lied their way into owning a real estate company catering to Southern California's BP. Beautiful People.

The series is what we've come to expect from producer Aaron Spelling - beautiful bods and fab faces involved in family crises (married architect played by Greg Evigan sleeps with co-worker) and shady deals (ambitious dude played by Lucky Vanous wipes out anyone who gets in his way).

For most likable in the cast of unlikables, I nominate Brittney Powell, who plays the receptionist in the company from where the immoral behavior springs. She's tied up with a loser - a doctor with a gambling problem.

Her character deserves better.

It's not ``Masterpiece Theater,'' but what's better than an Aaron Spelling soap to launch a career? She could be the next Heather Locklear. Powell, 25, is a former Army brat who lived in Seaford when her father was a colonel stationed at Ft. Eustis. She hadn't been in Hollywood but a few months when she auditioned for Spelling - for a role on ``Melrose Place.'' Powell didn't get the job but she impressed Spelling.

When he was casting for the part of the sweet but sensuous receptionist on ``Pacific Palisades,'' Powell got the call.

``No way did I think he'd remember me,'' Powell said. Powell has joined the gang of wholesome young women that Spelling has dressed in 16-inch minis. She isn't complaining about the Spelling formula that exploits beautiful women and makes boy toys of hunky men.

``It's fun to put on a lot of makeup and play dress-up because that's not the real me. I'm your natural, normal girl who likes being out in the fresh air.''

Powell on Tuesday is anything but fresh and normal in the role of a Los Angeles call girl in a Fox film, ``L.A. Johns.''

It has its campy moments in performances by Thomas Calabro of ``Melrose Place'' and Deborah Harry, but ``L.A. Johns'' is mostly a peek-a-boo look at prostitution - a bit too frank, too exploitative for primetime. It airs at 8 p.m.

That's the summer sizzle.

Here is some of what else you'll find on the TV screen as the weather heats up:

Fox two nights ago premiered an offbeat interview hour, ``The Ruby Wax Show,'' in which Wax shops, dresses up and hangs out in the bedrooms of the interviewees. It airs Mondays at 8:30. On July 14, Fox brings on ``Roar,'' which is about the 20-year-old hero of an Irish revolt in 400 A.D. This is offbeat programming in the style of ``Xena'' and ``Hercules.'' Fox on Mondays brings ``Mad TV'' from late-night TV to primetime, cuts it to 30 minutes and shows it at 8 p.m. before Wax's interviews.

MTV, not realizing that ``The Real World'' thing died with the disagreeable bunch in Miami, tries again on July 16 with ``The Real World'' in Boston. ``Oddville, MTV'' debuts Thursday at 11 p.m. Frank Hope hosts a show with weird but not necessarily interesting guests including a human pretzel and a mother and daughter comedy team.

``Road Rules'' comes back for a fourth season on MTV Saturday at 10 p.m. And on July 18, MTV starts ``Apt. 2F,'' which is about twins doing stand-up comedy - an act that belongs on ``Oddville, MTV,'' which will have a sneak preview Thursday night after ``the 1997 MTV Movie Awards.''

Home Box Office brought on sexy (and a little silly) sci-fi in ``Perversions of Science'' last weekend, showing among other things that it's hard to love a headless woman. The 10-part series continues Wednesdays at 11 p.m.

HBO plans two other summer series in ``Spicy City,'' an animated series for grownups which starts July 11 at midnight. Come July 12, HBO puts on ``Oz,'' a drama about life in a penitentiary where there are cannibals. Who'd expect Rita Moreno to appear in a project like this? She is one of the co-stars.

Now that his NBC series ``Boston Common,'' has been canceled, it's nice to see Virginia-born Anthony Clark has landed a new gig. He hosts ``Comic Cabana,'' a new series on Comedy Central Saturday night at 11. Comedy Central also introduces ``Make Me Laugh'' nightly at 6:30 this week. It's the revival of a 1950s game show with Ken Ober the host.

Showtime in July and August sets four new series in motion, starting with ``Dead Man's Gun'' on July 13 to be followed by ``The Hunger'' (July 20), ``Stargate SG-1'' (July 27) and ``Fast Track'' (Aug. 3). Until now, TV has never seen a series about a doctor who works at a NASCAR speedway. ``Fast Track'' is it.

``The Hunger'' is classic horror, says Showtime, while ``Stargate SG-1'' brings back Richard Dean Anderson in a sci-fi drama. ``Gun'' follows the path of one gun through the Old West.

With the kids home from school, a half dozen cable channels and CBS have produced summer specials for the under-12 crowd. CBS puts on ``Crayola Kids Adventures'' on Friday night at 8 starting in August. On USA, the creators of ``Saved by the Bell'' set up another series about teens striving to balance homework with their social lives. ``USA High'' also debuts in August.

If it's summer, it means the Major League All-Star Game is must-see TV for jocks on the couch. Fox has it this year (July 8) from Cleveland. There is also professional football (the World League) visible on fX Saturday at 4 p.m. and Sunday at 10 a.m., and on Fox June 22 at 1 p.m. There's also women's professional basketball, which NBC, Lifetime and ESPN will carry starting June 21 at 4 p.m. on ESPN - the New York Liberty vs. the Los Angeles Sparks.

If that doesn't make your summer, check out Showtime on Aug. 11. That's when ``Elvis Meets Nixon'' premieres. ILLUSTRATION: [Color Photos]

FOX

MTV

Send Suggestions or Comments to webmaster@scholar.lib.vt.edu