DATE: Sunday, June 29, 1997                 TAG: 9706270821

SECTION: FRONT                   PAGE: A7   EDITION: FINAL 

SERIES: TEACHING KIDS VALUES

        TOLERANCE

                                            LENGTH:   48 lines

TOLERANCE:

Tolerance n. Understanding the traditions and customs of people

from different ethnic and religious backgrounds. (Definition from

from Norfolk schools)

Here's the rub

People who come from different backgrounds often have conflicting

notions of what is acceptable behavior. When is tolerance just

another name for being overly permissive?

So What Would You Do?

You find out that a colleague is gay. You firmly believe that

homosexual behavior is a sin and is not to be tolerated. However,

before now you've always respected both your colleague's quality

work and his general demeanor. You've even considered him a friend.

Do you maintain the friendship?

Whatever you decide, would you discuss your dilemma and how you

handled it with your children?

Building Tolerance

Children learn to deal with difference by seeing how adults and

their fellow children deal with it. If you're fearful of people who

look or act differently, chances are your kids will be too because

they'll take your fear to mean that there's something wrong with

people who are different than they are.

Questions for children

1. Have you and your friends ever picked on people and made fun

of them until they cried? If so, why did you do it? Did you enjoy

it?

2. If you liked someone who later turned out to be a liar, would

you still want to be good friends?

3. If you told your friends everything about yourself, including

the things you are most ashamed and afraid of, do you think they

would like you less or more than they do now?''

Source: The Kids' Book of Questions, by Gregory Stock. KEYWORDS: VALUES CHILDREN

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