DATE: Sunday, September 7, 1997             TAG: 9709070150
SECTION: LOCAL                   PAGE: B1   EDITION: FINAL 

SOURCE: GUY FRIDDELL

                                            LENGTH:   52 lines

DO WE REALLY HAVE TO HAVE A SPECIAL DAY FOR GRAMPS?

Imagine my consternation upon learning last night that today would be called Grandparents Day.

Nobody consulted me on this move. It just sprang out of the brush like a saber-toothed tiger.

Probably some grandparents group thought it up.

That's why I mistrust various good-intentioned committees that tend to clutter up society.

Founders of an off-the-wall crowd set about trying to justify it without success 'til some marplot shouts: ``Hey, why don't we have a Grandparents Day!''

And there you are, saddled with another official Day.

Regular readers of this column - all two of you - will recall my opposing Father's Day. Some fathers - droves, probably - deserve recognition; but usually the old man is uneasy under such notice. He feels unworthy of it.

His attitude brings to mind Abe Lincoln's story about the fellow being ridden out of town on a rail who said, ``If it weren't for the honor of it I'd just as soon do without it.''

After all, mothers birth the children and spend more time with them in the earliest years although husbands today are trying to correct that imbalance.

For an eternity, mothers' sacrificial dedication to the young went unremarked.

So hail Mother's Day!

In often disjunct families, grandmothers pull double duty in subbing for mothers who have joined the work force.

I am thinking of one particular grandmother whose devotion to her grandchildren was such that in their company while she still remained a shaping force, she joined their activities with such delight that she became virtually one of them. They need no day to recall her.

An expert on grandparenting, Dr. Lillian Carson, urges us to enhance grandchildren's lives by reading to them and providing educational toys and games and shepherding them to museums, gardens, theater and music, and sending them little reminders that out of sight is not out of mind. All that is good for granny and gramps to do.

To be with grandchildren and help in their growth should be reward enough for grandfathers without sanctifying a day in their honor. Being an always reasonable fellow, as you know, I propose we have a Grandmother's Day!

After all, it would be a logical extension of Mother's Day into the next generation. We should let grandfather muddle along to do his best without being embarrassed by any official proclamation.

Some grandfathers, as they age, are given to inane utterances. How often have I heard a daughter-in-law cry a warning to her children: ``Guybo is just being silly!''

Which is the Lord's truth.

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